It has decent sound and nice melody but it builds up in a very boring fashion, it needs some percussion and orchestral bass elements, and the bell/pling sound is too loud. It needs A LOT more dynamic range to build up anticipation before the tense parts, you need to work more on velocities and volume and well placed bass/percussion. This sort of music is about utilizing a high dynamic range, powerful arrangement of instruments to create an epic feeling that something is about to go down and when the listener is about to blow from anticipation you unleash the full might of it.
I dont mean to put you down its not a bad song, but it is a very hard and demanding genre I¨m just hoping to set you in a good direction for you to improve.
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